tramampoline:

Favourite jokes

  • Referring to any four-legged animal as a weird dog
  • Massively underestimating the number of nearly uncountable objects
  • Massively overestimating the number of clearly countable objects
  • Bad puns in TV episode titles
smilefor-medarling:

Some of these are so awkward, and some are great, and there’s that one with the dad that’s just 100% heartbreaking.
smilefor-medarling:

Some of these are so awkward, and some are great, and there’s that one with the dad that’s just 100% heartbreaking.
smilefor-medarling:

Some of these are so awkward, and some are great, and there’s that one with the dad that’s just 100% heartbreaking.
smilefor-medarling:

Some of these are so awkward, and some are great, and there’s that one with the dad that’s just 100% heartbreaking.
smilefor-medarling:

Some of these are so awkward, and some are great, and there’s that one with the dad that’s just 100% heartbreaking.
smilefor-medarling:

Some of these are so awkward, and some are great, and there’s that one with the dad that’s just 100% heartbreaking.
smilefor-medarling:

Some of these are so awkward, and some are great, and there’s that one with the dad that’s just 100% heartbreaking.
smilefor-medarling:

Some of these are so awkward, and some are great, and there’s that one with the dad that’s just 100% heartbreaking.
smilefor-medarling:

Some of these are so awkward, and some are great, and there’s that one with the dad that’s just 100% heartbreaking.
smilefor-medarling:

Some of these are so awkward, and some are great, and there’s that one with the dad that’s just 100% heartbreaking.

smilefor-medarling:

Some of these are so awkward, and some are great, and there’s that one with the dad that’s just 100% heartbreaking.

(Source: owmeex)

"Make it a habit to monitor your mental-emotional state through self-observation. “Am I at ease at this moment?” is a good question to ask yourself frequently. Or you can ask: “What’s going on inside me at this moment?” Be at least as interested in what goes on inside you as what happens outside. If you get the inside right, the outside will fall into place. Primary reality is within, secondary reality without."
— Eckhart Tolle (via yeshecholwa)

(Source: thecalminside)

carriesfirstperiod:

my mom just looked at a spider at our kitchen and yelled “why do you have to be like that? you dont need that many eyes or legs you need to stop”

(Source: lmpossibleprincess)

mrsdallogay:

mrsdallogay:

my life got about a thousand times better once i stopped censoring myself

and by censoring i don’t mean i suddenly embraced indiscriminate swearing; i mean i stopped trying to sugarcoat my past or my feelings; i stopped lying by omission; i stopped having guilty pleasures; i began unabashedly enjoying whatever i liked; i became very honest; i cut out of my life poisonous people and negative ideals, and i am so, so much happier for it

(Source: zay4ik)

yongmuney:

why arent oven mitts called glovens

lzbth:

i just almost missed my train because i was taking a personality quiz to find out what fruit I am

wannajoke:

Shakira, Shakira

wannajoke:

Shakira, Shakira

chubbyghost:

Tumblr u sound like one of those over dramatic bloggers who got called out

the-goddamazon:

dilfgod:

I hate when people say money doesn’t buy you happiness. it does. it buys you financial stability, a nice house, nice cars, nice vacations and trips, healthier food, a better education, etc. like wearing burberry while driving around in an audi would probably make me pretty happy too. but it’s just that rich people often take their comfortable lives for granted and end up being spoiled and ungrateful for what they have 

Exactly.

massiv3:

so when are we gonna stop pretending beer tastes good

thequietrabbit:

Colbie Caillat’s new song “Try”…a self-acceptance anthem.

Please watch this. Don’t just listen.

striderbeegood:

tingletits:

notspying:

Summoning the ogrelord

he went to gods thumb and came back

Wow holes fandom way to climb out of your hole

(Source: amart)